FAQs to Help Overcome Your Fears of a Prostate Biopsy

After my urologist felt "a suspicious lump" and scheduled me for a prostate biopsy, anxiety and fear became  my constant companions. There were two primary sources of my fear. The first involved my fear of the procedure. The second involved the fear of receiving my biopsy results.

Knowing next to nothing about a prostate biopsy, I did what is second nature when needing information. I went online and searched "preparing for a prostate biopsy," and received more than 150,000 Google hits. My eyes glazed over. The amount of information was overwhelming.

I allowed my fears to determine the questions that needed answers. I've come to believe that anyone who is told they need a prostate biopsy should receive a list of Frequently Asked Questions. Here's my list of questions; hopefully, the answers will reduce your fears as it did mine.

How is a prostate biopsy performed? A transrectal biopsy is the most common method used. A  thin needle is inserted through the rectum, into the prostate. Several thin cylindrical "cores" of prostate tissue are removed and examined for prostate cancer.

Is the procedure painful? The experience of pain is highly subjective. You should know if or how your urologist plans to reduce your pain. If you're told there's no need to reduce the pain, it's my suggestion you insist on pain relief. With pain relief,  I'd say my pain level was at six on a scale with 10 being the most painful. Thankfully, the test doesn't take very long.

What are the ways to reduce the pain? My urologist injected lidocaine, which is a numbing drug, into my prostate to reduce the pain. The good news is the injection worked. The bad news is the injection to reduce your pain is mildly painful.

What are the risks of a prostate biopsy? You'll receive and sign a form detailing the risks of a biopsy. The most common risks cited are bleeding at the biopsy site, rectal bleeding, or infection. You may see blood in your urine. Your semen may be blood-colored for a week or so. Temporary impotence is not listed as a risk, but I was in the minority of men who experienced temporary impotence, lasting approximately two weeks, after my biopsy.

Can a prostate biopsy rule out cancer? Yes, but a negative biopsy is not necessarily a guarantee of being cancer-free. According to researchers at the Oregon Health and Science University Cancer Center, up to 25 percent of prostate biopsies give a false negative.

What do I need to know in order to understand my biopsy result?  Your Gleason score is a measure of how aggressive your tumor is likely to be. It is made by a pathologist looking at the cancer under the microscope.

Receiving the answers to your questions and concerns before your biopsy is the best way to prepare and reduce your fears about this procedure.

Note: This article appeared in Prostate Cancer News Today 

Rick Redner and his wife Brenda Redner wrote two award winning books. The first:

I Left My Prostate in San Francisco-Where's Yours?

provides men and couples with information and support before, during and after prostate surgery.

Their second book was written for couples living with!erectile dysfunction. After living with erectile dysfunction for four years, Rick chose penile implant surgery. The couple share how implant surgery changed their lives and relationship.

The title of their book is:

Everything You Never Wanted to Know About Erectile Dysfunction and Penile Implants.

How to - and Not to - Wait for Your Biopsy Results

After your biopsy, it can take anywhere from one to three weeks to receive your results. For many men (I’m in this group), waiting for your biopsy will be a highly stressful time. For me, each passing day of waiting was more miserable and stressful than the next.

 I don’t wait well. In the express lane in the grocery store, I’ll count how many items are in the carts of people in front of me. To the everlasting embarrassment of my wife and children, using a loud voice I might say: “Doesn’t the express lane have a 15 item limit?” There’s no doubt in my mind, if I had to drive to face a firing squad, I’d be in the left lane passing everyone I could. How I waited for my biopsy results taught me a few valuable lessons I’ll share with you.

Online, I found this definition of the word wait: “To remain inactive until something expected happens.”

I divide the waiting period into two phases. Phase one is the time you spend with no information about your biopsy results. Phase two is the day you receive your results. Here are some of the things I did in phase one.

I knew absolutely nothing about prostate cancer, so I went to our public library. I checked out a dozen books. I wasn’t reading to obtain facts about prostate cancer. I focused my attention on the worst information I could find. I ignored and dismissed the fact that “Nearly 100 percent of men diagnosed with prostate cancer while the cancer is in early stages are still alive five years after diagnosis.”

 I locked into the fact that “prostate cancer is the second-leading cause of male cancer-related death in the U.S.” I was selectively filtering the information I was reading in order to prove to myself that a diagnosis of prostate cancer is a death sentence.

The more frightened I became, the more I relied on mood-altering behaviors to help me cope. Examples of mood-altering behaviors are using drugs, alcohol, TV, computer games — anything that removes you from reality to avoid experiencing reality is a mood-altering behavior.

I used food. As I ate more, I gained weight. As I spent too many hours in front of the TV, I distanced myself from my friends, family, and my wife. I set myself up to experience isolation at a time when I needed lots of support.

If I had a do-over, I would:

• Read a lot less
• Spend more time with my family
• Take my wife on a weekend or week-long romantic vacation
• Spend a lot less time in front of the TV
• Exercise regularly
• Eat less junk food
• Find people further along in the journey to talk with both in person and online
• Listen to my wife’s fears and concerns
• Rely more on my faith and spend more time in prayer

Which (if any) of these suggestions appeal to you and/or your partner in your time of waiting for your biopsy results?

Note: This article appeared in Prostate Cancer News Today 

Rick Redner and his wife Brenda Redner wrote two award winning books. The first:

I Left My Prostate in San Francisco-Where's Yours?

provides men and couples with information and support before, during and after prostate surgery.

Their second book was written for couples living with!erectile dysfunction. After living with erectile dysfunction for four years, Rick chose penile implant surgery. The couple share how implant surgery changed their lives and relationship.

The title of their book is:

Everything You Never Wanted to Know About Erectile Dysfunction and Penile Implants.

Just My Imagination Running Away With Me

Receiving the news I needed a biopsy was the first time in my life that I had to deal with the possibility I had a life-threatening disease. For a doctor, telling someone they need a biopsy is a regular occurrence. For the patient receiving that news, it’s both traumatic and life changing.

When you receive the news you need a biopsy, it’s highly unlikely the medical system will acknowledge or address the emotional needs of the person receiving this news. I was totally unprepared to cope with the possibility I had prostate cancer. I left the doctor’s office in a daze. I couldn’t believe it was possible to have a potentially life-threatening disease, without any symptoms or warning.

On my first night, my imagination turned against me. I spent a good deal of my sleepless hours reliving how everyone I knew who was diagnosed with cancer had died. I had a host of people to remember, both personally and professionally. As a medical social worker, I witnessed people die from cancer in a hospital setting. Most of these deaths occurred before the hospice movement.

 In pre-hospice days, most doctors would not provide adequate pain control. In those days, the primary medical objective was to avoid creating drug dependency, rather than eliminate pain.

I suspect that’s the reason every cancer death I could recall involved people who suffered a great deal before they died. I replayed their suffering multiple times. After wallowing in those gruesome images, I inserted myself into the story. I imagined it wouldn't be long before I'd be one of those people in chronic pain, dying from prostate cancer.

Unfortunately, most of the people I knew who’d been diagnosed with cancer had died within a year of receiving their diagnosis. From my perspective, a diagnosis of prostate cancer was the equivalent of a death sentence. So I began to imagine everything I'd miss out on. Three of the most painful losses I experienced that night were:

Not living long enough to walk my daughter down the aisle

Not living long enough to be a grandparent

Not living long enough to enjoy retirement with my wife

I was convinced I'd die before any of these events occurred. By the time morning arrived, I was convinced my survival depended on my receiving a rapid diagnosis and treatment. I believed the only way to delay dying from prostate cancer depended on my ability to find a urologist who could get me in for a biopsy in less than 30 days. 

Even if it meant I’d need to travel to another city. I would have flown to the moon, if necessary, to cut down on my waiting time. Convinced my life depended on receiving a diagnosis and treatment as quickly as possible, I began the task of finding a urologist who would perform my biopsy in less than 30 days.

I’d entered into a race against time to diagnose and treat a silent enemy capable of killing me.

Note: This article appeared in Prostate Cancer News Today 

Rick Redner and his wife Brenda Redner wrote two award winning books. The first:

I Left My Prostate in San Francisco-Where's Yours?

provides men and couples with information and support before, during and after prostate surgery.

Their second book was written for couples living with!erectile dysfunction. After living with erectile dysfunction for four years, Rick chose penile implant surgery. The couple share how implant surgery changed their lives 

and relationship.

The title of their book is:

Everything You Never Wanted to Know About Erectile Dysfunction and Penile Implants.

My Journey With Prostate Cancer Begins

At age 58, I needed a prescription refill from my urologist. I was told it would be necessary for me to make an appointment for an examination before he could order a renewal. I’m not a fan of going see a doctor for any reason, especially when I’m feeling great, but I understood it was necessary if I wanted a refill.

When I arrived for my appointment, I discovered I wasn't scheduled with the urologist I had seen for 30 years. I was with a urologist I’d never seen before. He asked, "What brings you here today?" I replied, “Doc this will be the easiest and quickest appointment of your day. Give me my prescription renewal and I'm out of here.”

He said, “I’d be glad to do that, after I examine your prostate.”

I realized these types of misunderstandings occur when you see a doctor who is unfamiliar with your medical history. I directed him to my medical records where he'd discover I had this rather unpleasant exam less than six months ago. Because this is a yearly exam, it was obvious to me — and I expected also obvious to him — that I certainly didn't need another prostate exam.

I was ticked off that he didn't bother to check my medical records. Instead, he looked me in the eyes and said, “No prostate exam, no refill.”

I was tempted to walk out and show him that I was a consumer. He worked for me. And I didn’t want another exam. But, because I needed my refill, I pulled down my pants and assumed the position. I was confident this exam was totally unnecessary. Little did I know I was seconds away from hearing two sentences that would change my life forever.

The first sentence was, “I felt a suspicious lump.” The second sentence was, “I'll need to schedule you for a biopsy.”

I left the exam in a daze and I walked to the scheduling desk to make my appointment for my biopsy. I was told the earliest I could get in for a biopsy was a month away. I was scheduled to discuss the biopsy results two weeks later. The rapid transition from believing I was in the peak of health to receiving news that I could have a potentially life threatening disease, felt like a punch in the gut. I couldn’t catch my breath nor could I process my experience. It felt like I was in a bad dream. I wanted to wake up and start the day over.

As I pulled into my driveway at home, I was painfully aware that my wife Brenda was about to experience the awful transition that I had just experienced. Together, we were about to share one of the worst days of our married life. From that day until my biopsy, we’d be living with the terrifying reality that a biopsy would soon show that I had prostate cancer.

Note: This article appeared in Prostate Cancer News Today 

Rick Redner and his wife Brenda Redner wrote two award winning books. The first:

I Left My Prostate in San Francisco-Where's Yours?

provides men and couples with information and support before, during and after prostate surgery.

Their second book was written for couples living with!erectile dysfunction. After living with erectile dysfunction for four years, Rick chose penile implant surgery. The couple share how implant surgery changed their lives and relationship.

The title of their book is:

Everything You Never Wanted to Know About Erectile Dysfunction and Penile Implants.

Don't Let Cancer Hijack Your Sense of Humor

Proverbs-17:22
A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a broken spirit saps a person's strength.

One of the first things I did after I received the diagnosis of prostate cancer was unusual. I went online to look up jokes about prostate cancer. I knew I needed to do something to break the power of the fear and terror I was feeling. I was certain finding ways to laugh about prostate cancer would accomplish this goal. As it turned out, laughter and humor were vital to my emotional, relational and physical recovery.

Research about humor confirms it is very healthy for us to laugh. Laughing about cancer or death may not come naturally, but I hope at least one of these jokes demonstrates it's possible. These jokes brought laughter into my life at a time when I desperately needed it:
Joke #1
Doctor: Well, we better discuss treatment now for your prostate cancer. I recommend hormone therapy.
Man: Are there any side-effects?
Doctor: A few. You will have a loss of potency. You might get some hot flashes. And when lost, you will have an inexplicable urge to ask for directions.

Joke #2
Doctor: I've got your test results and some bad news. You have cancer and Alzheimer's.
Man: Boy, am I lucky! I was afraid I had cancer!


Joke#3
Three buddies were talking about death and dying. One asked, "When you're in your casket and friends and family are mourning you, what would you like to hear them say about you?"

The first guy says, "I would like to hear them say that I was a great doctor of my time and a great family man."

The second man says, "I would like to hear that I was a wonderful husband and school teacher who made a huge difference in our children of tomorrow."

The last guy says, "I would like to hear them say LOOK, HE'S MOVING!!!"

I hope you laughed at least once as you read the three jokes. Make it a top priority to laugh every day. Buy a few books with jokes, or go to the library. Take out as many books as you can find that tickle your funny bone. Rent comedies, find comical posts on YouTube, spend time with comical  friends and family, or spend time with young children.

Make laughter something you do together as a couple and/or a family. Laughter is good medicine.

Note: This article appeared in Prostate Cancer News Today 

Rick Redner and his wife Brenda Redner wrote two award winning books. The first:
I Left My Prostate in San Francisco-Where's Yours?
provides men and couples with information and support before, during and after prostate surgery.

Their second book was written after the couple dealt with erectile dysfunction for four years following Rick's double nerve sparing surgery. The book was written for men and couples coping with erectile dysfunction. The title of their book:
Everything You Never Wanted to Know About Erectile Dysfunction and Penile Implants.

How to Comfort Someone Diagnosed With Cancer

When I was first diagnosed with prostate cancer, I began the process of informing friends and family. As I shared the news, I was hoping to receive comfort and support. That's not what happened. Most of the people I told responded by sharing a chilling story of their own about someone in their life who died from cancer.

Looking back, I realize the story they told me was a window into what it was like to hear the news. At the time, their stories increased my anxiety and fears. Here's two examples of misguided comforting.

•  "I'm so sorry you have prostate cancer. That's what killed my father." After this comment I took a month-long break before telling another healthy person I had prostate cancer.
• *"Why are you complaining or think you need support? You've been cured of cancer and you should be feeling grateful."

There is a well-intentioned belief that providing good comfort involves saying something to make emotional pain less painful. If that's your goal,  the odds are you will say something the hurting person feels is foolish, unhelpful, or worse, will alienate the hurting person from you and other people.

 Telling someone who was recently diagnosed with prostate cancer they have "the good cancer"  is not remotely helpful. In fact, a such a foolish comment could damage your friendship.

Here's my solution for those who'd like to become a good comforter:

• Give up the goal of trying to reduce the other person's pain. Good comfort may increase the pain of the person who is hurting. How can that be?

• Good comfort gives a hurting person permission to share what they are thinking and feeling. Asking a question is a good beginning. A question like this: "What was it like for you to find out you had prostate cancer?" Good comfort doesn't shut down the hurting person; good comfort allows for the expression of what's on the mind of the person who needs your comfort.

• A good comforter listens without passing judgment.  A good comforter listens without offering comfort clichés or unsolicited advice. A good comforter doesn't feel guilty if he or she can't make another person's pain lessen or disappear. A good comforter has the courage to hear, listen and share in the suffering of another person.

My last piece of advice is this: If you don't know what to say, don't say anything; just listen. There are too few good listeners in this world. If you become a good listener, you'll become a great comforter.

Note: This article appeared in Prostate Cancer News Today 

Rick Redner and his wife Brenda Redner wrote two award winning books. The first:
I Left My Prostate in San Francisco-Where's Yours?
provides men and couples with information and support before, during and after prostate surgery.

Their second book was written after the couple dealt with erectile dysfunction for four years following Rick's double nerve sparing surgery. The book was written for men and couples coping with erectile dysfunction. The title of their book is:
Everything You Never Wanted to Know About Erectile Dysfunction and Penile Implants. 

Staying Healthy Involves More Than Beating Cancer

On 2/22/18 at 7am, I was standing in my bathroom. Suddenly, crushing chest pain brought me to the ground. I found myself lying on my bathroom floor struggling to breathe. It felt as though an elephant was sitting on my chest. I discovered taking short, rapid breaths enabled me to breathe.

 My panic subsided once had sufficient air.

I wondered whether I was going to take my last breath alone, on my bathroom floor, I laughed out loud. The thought of surviving  prostate cancer, only to die in my bathroom struck me as humorously ironic. I thought of two options:

                   

• I had my cell phone. If I dialed 911 help would arrive in a matter of minutes.

•My wife was sleeping on the other side of the door. I wondered if I should wake her to say what could be my last words.

Lying on the floor, I recalled the last time I went to an ER complaining of chest pain and pain radiating down my right arm. An hour after my arrival to the ER, still waiting for my exam, I worried about the possibility of dying in the ER waiting room. I left the ER, and drove to the nearest Urgent Care Center.

As soon as I described my complaint I was ushered into an exam room and hooked up to an IV. A short time later, an ambulance arrived. They drove me back to the ER where I'd waited for an hour!

Arriving to the ER by ambulance I was immediately given an EKG and blood tests. This was my third time going to an ER with chest pain. Hours later, I was told there was nothing wrong with my heart. I felt like the boy who cried "Wolf." There was no way I'd go to an ER for the fourth time with a complaint of chest pain.

So, I remained on the floor until the pain went away. When it did, I quietly left the bathroom and went downstairs. About two hours later I went upstairs to wake my wife. About three hours after walking, her I told her about my experience in the bathroom.

I wasn't surprised when she suggested I immediately go to the ER. In the spirit of compromise, I called my doctor. His office said they could see me in four days. I set my appointment.

When I told my wife I had a doctor's  appointment in four days, she wasn't as pleased with me, as I was with myself. She wanted me to get a medical evaluation now. I was adamantly against an ER visit, so I called an Urgent Care Center. I explained that I'd experienced chest pain five hours ago and that I needed an EKG to assess if there was any damage to my heart. They gave me an appointment in thirty minutes. I was delighted.

My wife drove me to the Urgent Care Center. Twenty minutes later a staff member called my name. She said “I'm sorry to inform you that our location doesn't have an EKG.” I told her that when I called for my appointment I specifically stated that I needed an EKG. I asked why they didn't tell me there wasn’t an EKG.

She explained that the location I called for my appointment had a EKG. Naturally, my next question was: "Why would they send me to the location without an EKG when I stated specifically that I needed an EKG?" She shrugged her shoulders and apologized.

Frustrated and annoyed, I asked my wife to drive me home. She suggested we drive directly to the ER. It was time for a compromise. I promised I'd immediately inform her (rather than wait five hours) if I experienced another incident of chest pain. She told me she'd call 911, which meant I'd be heading to an ER by ambulance.

I accepted our compromise with the belief there was no way my chest pain would return.  I felt grateful I'm blessed with a wife who takes an active role in my health care decisions.

Four days later I saw my doctor. They performed an EKG. It was normal. I felt vindicated, for my decision to avoid the ER. As a PC survivor, it's easy to get laser focused on surviving prostate cancer, that we neglect other aspects of our health.

Cleveland Clinic surveyed five hundred men. They found only three in five men get an annual physical, and just over 40 percent go to the doctor only when they fear they have a serious medical condition.

Just as our cars have maintaince schedules, we need yearly physicals.

Our partner, our children, grandchildren,  great-grandchildren, family, and friends, appreciate our ongoing efforts to stay in their lives by taking care of our health.

My Doctor referred me to a Cardiologist.

 I'm keeping that appointment.

Note: This article appeared in Prostate Cancer News Today 

Rick Redner and his wife Brenda Redner wrote two award winning books. The first:

I Left My Prostate in San Francisco-Where's Yours?

provides men and couples with information and support before, during and after prostate surgery.

Their second book was written after the couple dealt with erectile dysfunction for four years following Rick's double nerve sparing surgery. The book was written for men and couples coping with erectile dysfunction. The title of their book is:

Everything You Never Wanted to Know About Erectile Dysfunction and Penile Implants.